By Jim Ayres

I finally made it to Hamburger Mary’s for brunch—and I loved it! The food was good, the show was great and everyone in the place was smiling and happy. Really, what more could you ask for?

I’d of course heard some early reports. Hamburger Mary’s was still working out the kinks. Stories of confused service, incorrect orders and missing burger sauces were leaking. Unfortunate experiences to be sure, especially when one is spending hard earned cash on a

But the truth is, most restaurants have some sort of growing pains in their first weeks. And based on my recent brunch experience with a group of 11, Hamburger Mary’s is reaching its stride.

We had reserved a table with a nice view of the stage, and the Birthday Girl (ha!) was channeling Holly Go-Not-So-Lightly in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. The staff couldn’t have been more accommodating as we decorated our table for the occasion. Pro tip: Reservations for brunch are a must, as there are two seatings, one starting at 11 a.m. and the other at 3 p.m.

BG’s vodka martinis from the very capable bar were cold and refreshing. Those of us who love mimosas found these to be light and tasty, with just the right kick for a birthday celebration. (And every table in the house was celebrating one.)

“ Broadway Brunch” is the theme on Sundays, and we loved the country style show hosted by Violet S’Arbleu and Jonathan Teverbaugh. Entertainers Roofie DuBois, Chaney Moore and Hailey Hussey kept us laughing (and tipping). The mood was bright and, well, gay—and it just got better when we got our food.

We all thought the hamburgers were delicious. I ordered the Queen Mary with Jack and Cheddar cheese, bacon, and Mary’s sauce (yep, I got my sauce, Chris). The bun was fresh and chewy; the patty was seasoned well and cooked exactly to my medium rare preference. Going with crispy Ta-Ta’s (tater tots) as my side dish was highly recommended and turned out to be the right choice.

My friend was similarly ecstatic over his Black & Bleu Boy burger. He loves bleu cheese and there was plenty of it! On the other side of me, another friend enjoyed his Love Me Tender wrap, thickly stuffed with chicken, cheese, bacon and ranch dressing. Across the table breakfast platters and Chicken & Waffles were devoured with gusto.

Hamburger Mary’s dining room is casual and easily rearranged for large groups, special shows and big events. Service was charming (an extra server at brunch wouldn’t hurt anything)
and all orders were correct and accounted for. Checks delivered in stilettos are a wacky final touch.

Yes, the videos and sex toys have moved next door to make way for some good clean fun. And that’s the heart of Hamburger Mary’s. Everyone, of any age, is welcome. The shows aren’t raunchy but instead put everyone in an uplifted spirit—so nice in these uncertain times. We’re all there to have a great time, so in the immortal words of the namesake hostess, “ Eat, Drink & be MARY!”

Hamburger Mary
2409 Grant Street
Houston, Texas 77006
(713) 677-0674